Last Monday morning I was inspired to create a #PysankyForPeace project, making Ukrainian decorated eggs to honor Ukraine’s fallen, and to honor Berehynia-Oranta, the ancient mother goddess of the region, as a protector of her land and people. As a contemporary pagan, I did the sorts of observances and rituals one does when making the acquaintance of a new deity or spirit ally. I was really charged up, inspired, and when I couldn’t find my old egg decorating kit, ordered new ones. I couldn’t wait to get into the wax and dyes.
But by Monday afternoon, I was embroiled in the newest installment of a very old trouble in my life: family matters of amazing ugliness. I don’t know if you’ve ever been troubled by a persistent, brooding malevolent figure (PBMF) in your own life, but if you have, you know how helpless, angry, and sad it can make you. Well, I’ve had someone playing this role for almost two decades–telling lies about me to family and friends and just generally not ever missing an opportunity to discredit and besmirch me, as well as to defraud me. This newest episode is pretty hateful and I lost my temper at first. But I didn’t lose my sense of irony. Here I was, trying to dedicate myself to peace and yet being swept up in some of the very same emotions that fuel war (emotions far short of homicidal rage, I will add).
It’s been very difficult to regain my equilibrium, I will tell you. The old wounds never healed and the fresh ones, well, they’re currently playing havoc in my gut. Of course, this kind of reaction is exactly what my PBMF wants and enjoys. However in an effort to calm my frustration, I’ve taken refuge in legal advice. I think I have discovered exactly how to turn this situation around. I desire justice, truth, transparency, and an end to fraud. I may be in a position to work toward that. The PBMF’s own words provided the final key to unlock the strategy. Sometimes you have to wait a long time for a cocky adversary to reveal their strategy. I’ve waited nineteen years.
So, while I’m not in any way, shape, or form trying to compare my grief and anger to the violence taking place in Ukraine and elsewhere, I am observing how a set of well-placed triggers can cause individuals to do far worse things than they would have done otherwise. And when similar triggers are collective, well then… Add to that the Ruling Class’s manipulation of such triggers to consolidate their acquisition of yet more money and power, via domination and destruction, and you have the recipe for everything that makes for the worst in humanity. In microcosm, it’s kind of how my PBMF rolls.
Today, finally calmer (though still with a painful body), I will devote my thoughts once again to peace in Ukraine and elsewhere. I have my egg decorating kits now and am about to mix my dyes. I offer these efforts to the perennial struggle for peace at home and abroad.
P.S. In my professional life I will donate 50-80% of my client fees to Ukraine humanitarian aid for the next month, starting today. Let’s all do what we can.