March 2023 – Lady Of The Lake

Queer, trans, drag, intersex & all kinds of other friendly…

…Not to mention frankly pro-Hawaiian Kingdom restoration; opposed to the continued militarization of the Pacific; opposed to GMO crops on the island and the diversion of water from family farms to gated commuities: pro-pagan and witchy; all with a certain amount of side-eye for various aspects of “transplant” culture…

Here in this United States, literary life looks a little weird for those of us writing of a braver and gayer new world than Huxley would have ever imagined.

Just check out this depressing article about the rising muck of ignorance and hate in America, engineered with deliberate cruelty by the far right fringe:

Limbong, Andrew. New report finds a coordinated rise in attempted book bans. NPR. 9/19/22.

Here’s the report mentioned in the above article: Banned in the USA: The Growing Movement to Censor Books in Schools, PEN America, 9/19/2022. The graphic below is from the report, as posted on the PEN website.

Checking off 6 out of 7 banned book boxes

Looking at the above image and summary, my lovely, whimsical fantasy series of a band of aging, arty misfits living in a rural intentional community on the island of Hawai’i, who encounter Elves and supernatural foes and learn magic while falling in various kinds of love, checks 6 out of the 7 categories. If I’d set out to write specifically to the criteria for books banned from schools in 2022, I couldn’t have done a better job. Really! Someone give me a medal or something!

However, these books are written for adults, not youngsters. The human protagonists are in my age group (“older”) and while the Elves may have the gloss and glamour of perpetual youth, they are far older than the human “Hermits” who are their magical apprentices. And there is very little explicit sex, though there are teasing references and frank admissions to a very wide array of gender and sexual (and asexual) interests. Even so, I suspect there will be some people who hate The Guild of Ornamental Hermits series and all that it stands for, just as much as there will be some (many more, I hope) who love the series with all their hearts.

Really, my characters are made to be loved, in all their quirks and queerness. There is joy, yearning, heartbreak, awe as well as greed, deception, and otherworldly badness–such as the Wethrini warriors setting upon the hapless goat seller, Toledo Jackson. And I can’t wait for readers to start “shipping” my characters in ways I’ve never considered!

We all know what’s up with the poor sodden dopes who comprise the far right fringes of the USA: “they hate us for our freedoms!” I, for one, will write for joy and juice until my last breath. And honestly, the book banners really are doomed to failure. Nothing they want to repress will ever go back in the box–or the closet–again. Our magic and love are stronger than their hate.

The Dire Deeds and The Witching Work will be followed by The Queerest Quest (Book 3, completed and with the publisher) and The Perilous Past (Book 4, in progress).

☽☆☾

And so here we are, with another “biohazard,” another autobiographical post–a dangerous and perhaps ridiculous preoccupation for someone in their late sixties. What prompts it? Celebrating a grey day, maybe, and also, a mixture of feelings both sad and celebratory, triggered by the process of cleaning up duplicates and old files on my trusty computer. A kind of archeology for someone still alive…

Also, prompted by two conversations with friends, one a zoom conversation yesterday morning with my friend in France and the other today, with a new friend who lives just a few blocks away. Oh, and an email this morning from someone who pulled song lyrics I’d co-written in 2004 with Puanani Rogers, from a box in the Richard Kekuni Blaisdell Hawaiian National Archive.

My friend Mickey exclaimed at one point, “You’re so accomplished!” (She is immensely accomplished herself.) Well, that made me feel good, and yet there’s a kind of bitterness with hearing that as some people that I used to be closest with never really acknowledged my abilities and value, and my efforts to “pull my weight” somehow, someway, in spite of my being confined (literally) by almost 35 years of environmental illnesses and chronic fatigue; my constant pursuit of education to better myself and my ability to make meaningful, creative, and helpful contributions to this weird world of ours, whether through volunteerism, activism, writing, client work, teaching, and a variety of other things. Where I have a passion, I contribute as much as I can.

So maybe this post is not just an archeology but an exorcism of those who are corrosive and envious: y’all can go fuck off, and you know who you are! Cause I can’t stop, won’t stop, and fucking love NOT STOPPING with growing, even if it is in a little fragrance-free hothouse of a life. You think I’m hard work? That’s because you’ve never acknowledged the work that I did, the work I still do.

I’ve had a lot of passions in my life, a few major epiphanies, and some really out there mystical experiences. Some of what I picture in this blog post will reflect some of those while this particular blog reflects my occult and mystical interests. I am not the first person to have a wide array of interests and I won’t be the last. Some people, however, just can’t handle this.

Let’s be slightly chronological (though ignoring the passions of my teen years). Start with adulthood.

Punk Fashion Design

San Francisco, late 70s-early 80s. Made clothes and purses. Put on fashion shows. Still in good health. Below left, flyer for my first fashion show, at the Mabuhay. Below right, photo shoot with Jaen Anderson for Slick Magazine. Model Shellagh is behind me.

Feminist Outer Space Exploration

San Francisco, mid-80s. The result of my first epiphany. Co-founded a non-profit to promote women’s involvement in outer space exploration. We put on educational programs and I did some writing. Meanwhile I also worked at a public opinion research and consulting firm and got married in 1985. Still in good health. Below left, flyer for The Hypatia Cluster. Below right, speaking at The Aerospace Corporation in El Segundo, CA.

In a Band

The Vague, San Francisco, mid-1980s, before childrearing. Still in good health. Our last gig was the Polk Street Merchants cable car celebration. We “opened” for Tony Bennett (“I Left My Heart in San Francisco”). Below left, photo by Billy Douglas. My (now ex) husband is second from left. Below right, New Years Eve, 1983, Club Foot. (Photo probably also by Billy Douglas.)

Start a Business

Started a furniture finishing business with husband, in San Francisco, mid to late 1980s. I learned faux finishes, gilding, and glazing at the Day Studio Workshop. And here’s where I became exposed to paints and solvents which would eventually make me ill. Some of my sample boards are still shown on the company’s website, but without crediting me for the artwork.

Start a Family

My children were born in 1989 and 1996. I began to show signs of environmental illness during my first pregnancy. Since I couldn’t work in the shop anymore, I worked at home doing the bookeeping while caring for the kids.

Environmental Health Activism

San Francisco, early to late 1990s, President and later a board member of the Environmental Health Network of CA. Very sick with multiple chemical sensitivity/environmental illness while also raising children, volunteering at their nursery schools, etc. With the help of the disability students office, I also was able to complete the University of San Francisco’s Development Director certificate program in 1997. I wore masks in public long before the pandemic. Below left, my decorated respirator. Below right, detail from an EHN hat.

Anthroposophy

It was one of those epiphanies. It was mystic. It was unsettling. It changed my life. What else can I say? My oldest was in Waldorf School, for which I am apparently never to be forgiven.

And Then, Another Epiphany… Hawai’i Nei

The year 2000. My life was upended by this trip to Maui, all expenses paid (below left). I was scared to go because I was so sick. But I went. Yes, the hotel and beach were lovely, but I was beset by a feeling of homecoming (I know, it seemed ridiculous to me then also) and also sensing spirits of the land. And I felt physically great! It changed my life. Of course I became obsessed when I got back to the San Francisco Bay Area, learning all I could about culture, history, sovereignty…. I even made Waldorf style tabletop puppets and gave shows at the nursery schools.

Based on *The Gift of Aloh*a, a children’s book.

Above left, a protest song co-written with the awesome activist kupuna, Puanani Rogers from Kaua’i, back in 2004. Above right, one of ten pages of Hawaiian language newspapers that I transcribed for the Ike Ku’oko’a Initiative around 2012 or so. I was one of about 6,500 volunteers. I would gladly do this transcription work again–it was so interesting!!!

Sexology & Hypnosis

The letters after my name spell “mid-life crisis.” I was desperate to find a way to earn a living. I went back to school, earning two degrees in human sexuality (DHS and Ed.D.) and went through hypnosis certification trainings. I did stuff.